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My Story Time Sep 01, 2026,

Hi, My name is Pamela TopjianI am 60 years old and at age 50 I had a mental breakdown.

My life was full of childhood trauma, two abusive marriages and after my second divorce is when I had a mental breakdown, I was very anxious, fearful, and even suicidal.

I got on a bus with a one-way ticket to move halfway across the country alone at age 50 - this was as a last ditch effort to save my life.

I grew up on poverty and always felt inadequate. No father in my life led to a lot of lack and no guidance or modeling or mentoring growing up. Which ledto relationships with toxic people.

Having a mental breakdown was the most difficult experience in my life.

It was unfair and unjust that my mother in the '70's wasn't able to get any assistance from my father to raise 3 children on her own.

I believe that not having my father in my life led to most everything that wastraumatic in my life. I had very little supervision, and was alone a lot of the time. I survived two date rapes as a young teen. My eldest sister lost her life in a car accident at age 18, just before my 14th birthday. I married two abusivemen and eventually a mental breakdown.

I realize that you can never know what people are going through or have been through.

That children all deserve to be taken care of regardless of the situation theirparents are in. While children are often thought of as resilient, if any traumawas suffered, therapy or counseling should be a part of their care, even if they "seem" fine.

As I mentioned above, I think society needs to do better at taking care of the children. Therapy for everyone needs to be more accessible as well.

I've had so many different "situations" but I think people misunderstand thatthere is always hope. that even if you can't see how, you can make it out.People also misunderstand how debilitating depression and/or anxiety can be, unless they've been through it.

Knowing all that I have come out of. I'm very self aware these days and if I feelany depression or anxiety or even just feeling low, I don't let it get ahead ofme. I step back and look at the bigger picture. What can be done, how did thiscome about in the first place, can I trace it back to something in that day or week beforehand. Also having healthy boundaries, knowing what helps - for me meditation, time alone, nature and animals.

My life right now is so much better than I ever imagined was possible. It gives me hope knowing that anything can happen at any time, isn't just for the bad stuff, but a miracle (or just something unexpectedly good) can also happen atany time!

I did write it all out and publish a book. Is that art? As a painting a woman mostly underwater, with a lot of mud surrounding her feel and ankles. then her

head and face above water shining in the sun with a big smile. I like the metaphor of the lotus for my life.

I'm not sure why, but pink came to mind right away.

First thought was birds singing.

"I Didn't Come This Far To Only Come THIS Far"

That there is always hope and that healing can and often does happen. Even

later in life. To hold on. To write everything out. To reach out for help. My own future, I hope to write some more and inspire people. I hope this amazing life continues. That we will have more recourses for the children. To keep children safe and

make sure they all are fed, educated and have a safe home. Also that people

will believe others when they say something happened to them.

There's nothing special or different about me, if I can make it out of my life of trauma to live a life that I love - anyone can.

I’ve written two books about my life. I’m married and in the most loving, respectful and equal relationship I’ve ever known.

I have my own Podcast on holistic health. I am also a former nurse, and now full-time Pet Sitter.

I’ve never been happier!

I think it’s really important to share these kinds of stories to help people know that they’re not alone, for those going through something similar. And to also help people know that you can come out of these dark spaces.